I thought I Was Woke, then I Woke Up (3/3)

No more for social commentary, let’s now go into some personal stories. More specifically, back when I thought I did something, when I thought I was woke to the point I belittled others for not being me and being like others.

I grew up surrounded mostly by guys, and the women who raised me were not the typical women, especially from the standards of before. All of my cousins, and future siblings, are guys. So growing up, I was mostly exposed to ‘boy things’

And I wore this like a badge of honor. I was proud how I got more guy friends, I would rather watch wrestling and MMA on my spare time, my toys were of soldiers and guns, converse to heels. It even got to the point where I hated girls, for being girls, for liking what they like.

In this age, I thought I was better than everybody else, and how I was more superior and intelligent. “Woke” wasn’t an existing term back then. But if it was, I would most definitely describe myself as that, woke. Solely because I was different from societal norms.

It was only when I was in 8th grade did I realize how dumb and misogynistic my perspective was. And no to mention, how much of a liar I am to myself. It dawned on me just later on how I wasn’t being myself, but was just doing it to be different and to feel better about myself.

And as I realized this, I became lost myself. I want to start doing things I want, even if it is expected of me, but what are those? I still enjoy what I was doing and watching, the friends I have, where do I start? Not changing is an option, but I just felt something was off, and I couldn’t pinpoint what it was.

Not to go into details since finding out my true self is not the topic of this post, it’s about realizing how my mindset was wrong and harmful. I shouldn’t put down anybody else in the expanse of myself, because they are doing what society expects them to do. We are all different and unique, and there’s nothing wrong with following trends.

At the end, what’s important is that we are happy of what we are doing without bringing other people down.